Fo SHizzle

2011-07-21T21:26:00.003-07:00

Sometimes I really think I'm the last thing on her priority list, really kinda sucks. Oh well just doing this day by day.

2011-07-21T21:26:00.001-07:00

Sometimes I really think I'm the last thing on her priority list, really kinda sucks. Oh well just doing this day by day.

During my lunch break

2011-07-07T11:56:00.000-07:00

its the 3rd day of my program and im here at lunch in the classroom. IM SO HAPPY IT HAS FINALLY STARTED. but as expected the one person i want to share my day to, i havent talked to since monday. So they have no idea how its been because they are too "busy" haha.

All i got to say is WHATEVERS! If the only time you can talk is when you finish doing anything else important or not (when im already sleeping) then i guess we will just never talk. and eventually break up. i hate the fact that thats whats always on my mind. "are we gonna make it?" "is she gonna change and step up to the plate?" "is she gonna keep her promises?" every one of those questions are a no and i am indifferent to them. its expected from her so i guess this will be my expectation from now on. not to be able to trust the one i love the most. That the one i love is unreliable, immature, and just doesn't want to grow up any time soon. well i guess i should have seen this coming and im gonna have to live with it. either something changes or we break up.

I've done enough changing in this relationship. so meh! we will see how the next few weeks will be.....

New motto

2011-05-31T08:40:00.000-07:00

Dont have high expectations for the one you love so u can never be disappointed and hurt by them :D I want to think like this so bad so i can stop feeling the way I've been feeling. So tired of theses stupid games, maybe it is better if we just broke up. You don't want to try and I'm tired of the only one trying, that's a perfect combination for a disaster.....we'll see how the next few days will go.....

I NEED SCHOOL TO START ALREADY!!! SO I HAVE SOMETHING TO DO AND I DONT JUST KEEP THINKING ABOUT THIS CRAP! 1 MORE MONTH PLEASE LET THIS MONTH ASS BY FAST...
S

it sucks that....

2011-05-30T19:56:00.000-07:00

i just realize that i have a lot of good friends, but i don't have anyone to talk to about how i really feel sometimes, like how much i have been hurting the past few weeks and how much pain and stress its caused, and just when i i try to get over it, she hits me again with stressful things.... it hurts but i've learned to try to deal with it better, BUT it still hurts no matter what. And since you act like there is nothing wrong, then i wont. cuz im tired of trying so lets see how long this takes until it blows up... tic toc, tic toc, tic toc!

PS GENELLE!

2011-05-27T15:53:00.001-07:00

HOW OD I POST FROM MY IPHONE! HAHA I FORGOT HOW TO DO THIS!

been too long since i have posted on here!!

2011-05-27T15:50:00.001-07:00

Im so excited to start blogging again! haha well ill keep it short, so basically my last few blogs is exactly the way ive been feeling again. with the same person but this time im not really whinning and complaining because i said i wouldnt do that im not gonna be sad. just over it. if you want to make it work then we will, if you dont then this is just a ticking time bomb ready to explode :D k its up to you! Nice and blunt, just how i like it! HAVE A GOOD MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND EVERYONE!

FINALLY!

2010-04-17T15:39:00.001-07:00

Dating Mistake #6: Being Too Selfish in Your Relationship
One of the downsides of being independent is that it can lead to some self-absorbed tendencies—a huge turnoff for men looking for a serious relationship, says Ming Gregory, a professional matchmaker at Color Blind International Dating Service. So make sure you’re giving as much as you’re receiving in your next relationship. “A partnership involves two people who share mutual interests and mutually benefit one another,” she says. “It’s not just about what being with him can provide you; it’s about how you can come together to complement each other.”

2010-03-11T09:02:00.001-08:00

It sucks. yet again, that when im having a tough time the person who should be here for me is too busy in her schedule. Well maybe my sadness will catch you an a less busy week, when you are more free? .............

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2009-12-08T16:13:00.001-08:00

So theres a couple thats been sitting across from me talking about life, politics, religion. Ive always wanted to do that with someone :/ Totally jealous!

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Man....

2009-11-06T14:14:00.001-08:00

It feels like things are going back to how they were before, here comes the depression.... it sucks how some people really just dont get it, you dont get the hint, dont get the point, so whats the point? IM pretty tired of caring so much, it sucks this is happening when i am doing this stupid diet. its hard enough i have nothing in my stomach which means no nutrients which in turn means no energy but the person i want the most by my side is AGAIN too busy to care, too busy to talk, too busy to text back. I guess its true that God is the only ONE you can depend on. Lord give me the strength to stay on this diet. you are the only one i can count on for strength and encouragement.

So today at work got pretty bad its now my 4rth day on the lemonade but my 5th day dieting and i got dizzy as a mofo and felt very lethargic hopefully it gets better and i get passed this. I just want someone to talk to you know. doesnt that suck being in a relationship but still feel like you have no one to talk to. I guess i just gotta build that bridge again and get over it like i get over everything else.

2009-10-30T00:34:00.001-07:00

It really sucks to put yourself out there, feel awkward and make a fool out of yourself for the person you care most about, only to have them reject you in your face...... :( but not once or twice but 3 freaken times.....

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lifes emotions IS a rollercoaster

2009-10-24T11:18:00.001-07:00

lifes emotions IS a rollercoaster and here it is again going downhill.....

one more try Just 1

2009-10-09T12:19:00.001-07:00

one more try Just 1 MORE

i lost her.... its over.....

2009-10-08T10:38:00.001-07:00

i lost her.... its over.....

her birthday

2009-10-08T00:02:00.001-07:00

i cant even talk to her on her brithday cuz shes out with her friends at 12 am. pretty , what a great end to my day...

depression

2009-10-06T00:05:00.000-07:00

you know ive been trying so hard to make things better. tonight i decided to make my final push to make things better for us. i was being nice, cute on the phone. and i really tried for us to talk and be like how it was before but for you to fall asleep while we were doing devotion really really hurt. after we hung up i ended up crying for a bit because it just sucks, i was so excited for this. i thought to myself "this is the right thing to do we are able to truly talk about God and learn about him" And for you to fall asleep our first time doing it, and not just once but 3 times. You just dont care and you arent trying. And it hurts so much because you just dont seem to care about this relationship enough to try now. How is it so easy to be on facebook doing mindless things, and so hard for you to stay awake when you are talking to me, and during a devotion to? I'm tired of trying so hard, im tired of being the one that feels bad for making you feel bad. im tired of getting hurt i just dont want to try anymore. I told myself this was my last real push to try to make thins good between us. and I TRIED MY HEART OUT but it just isnt enough. i was hesitant to type this on here but i dont care anymore, whats the point of this if i dont express how i feel, plus not very many people read this anyway. But if you do, i just want you to know, tonight you have hurt me worse then you have ever did before. but im not going to tell you. im just going to sit here and take it all in and if i have to cry by myself. I really just dont know what to do anymore...

i realy dont know what to do anymore...

2009-10-05T23:50:00.000-07:00

tonight really blew....

im losing all hope, Lord

2009-10-05T17:17:00.001-07:00

im losing all hope, Lord help me

These past few 5 weeks have been

2009-09-23T19:51:00.000-07:00

the most depressing weeks of my life, im not even kidding, this is no exageration i really have been feeling down and in the slumps. and the worst part is when it seems like its getting better it goes back to CRAP, which makes it worse! i hate getting my hopes up and getting happy then getting even more sad it sucks, and frankly it pisses me off a little. but what can you do about it right, you go through these things to be a better person. have a stronger heart, better character; or at least thats what i hope i come out to be when this is over, IF it even ends.

2009-09-01T20:01:00.001-07:00

lord i pray that you help me through my struggles and that you let me lean on your shoulder 100% and not on my own strength help me to let go and trust that everything is and was always in your hands, because i am honestly sick and tired of feeling the way i have been its time to put all of my trust back into you AMEN!

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in th PI

2009-07-18T06:47:00.000-07:00

so its been a while since i have blogged. Im here in the PI at the internet cafe by ate knatz' house, ken kimi and char are with me. We just got back from baguio a few hours ago, it was an 8 hours drive!!! well the trip is more than half way over!! and its been pretty amazing! so much has happened, ive kept a journal on my laptop but im hesitant to put it on here if u say so i will, haha but ya 2morrow we perform at word of hope church which sits over a thousand people at their 8 am service! pray for us please! then after the first halfof the missions team gors back to the states! i hope u guys are ready i bought a lot of pasalubong, well not really haha but man i love the cheap prices. im about to get a 2 hour massage for 10 bucks! mmwwwaaahahahah and they do it at the house in our air conditioned room, man the life of a missionary is HARD!@ HEHE SEE U GUYS IN 3 WEEKS!

2009-06-29T22:48:00.001-07:00

so we are on the plane waiting to go to the PI they delayed our flight so we can arrive there at 3:30 in the morning! well i gtg they said we have to turn off our phones! talk to you guys in pinas!

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2009-05-27T13:34:00.001-07:00

Man! back to back and hopefully TO BACK awesome weekends! 2 weeks agao i was able to go up north to vallejo with the missions team to perform for chars church! it was amazing! i was able to perform for the less fortunate and serve them food! totally humbling experience . then this passed weekend went to cellebrate EJS bday at the block then guppies with jim my sister and mike. then on sunday the missions team performed at TLCC the speaker was spectacular! then we went to kuya jons for a great BBQ THEN FISHING AT NIGHT! I CAUGHT A STINGRAY! IT WAS AWESOME! THEN WE WENT TO NORMS FOR A LATE DINNER. MAN I LOVE THAT PLACE! then monday (MEMORIAL DAY!) we had a kickback at my house so much food and drinks! it was a really good turn out, about 30 + people. Awesome 3 on 3, Awesome guitar hero, not so awesome lakers, but we will get them tonight!

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so im bored at work,

2009-05-05T19:43:00.001-07:00

so im bored at work, got nothing to do, just waiting to get my full 4 hours so i can clock out! well my week is good! bye!

PROM WAS FREAKEN AMAZING! best

2009-04-26T21:26:00.001-07:00

PROM WAS FREAKEN AMAZING! best prom i have been to ever! and if you are wondering it was my 4rth one! I KNOW RIGHT!

2009-03-22T22:19:00.001-07:00

im buying these next!! only 53$! lol hopefully they still have this in my size!

2009-03-22T22:17:00.000-07:00

look what i bought today!! only 46$ i love Undefeated sales!! it was normally 100+!! :) but i wanted to buy the other one also! :(

kids these days, i tell

2009-03-20T13:43:00.001-07:00

kids these days, i tell you they will try anything to fit in.....

2009-03-05T08:33:00.001-08:00

So im in line at our bursars office waiting to pay for my classes, i dont know why but it feels like a friday! its crazy! this week is passing by pretty slow, maybe cuz i went snowboarding on tuesday, and its like too early in the week to do something that awesome! haha but i thought it would actually be the opposite. but whatever what the im at the register and it cost 135! i thought it would be like 120! lame i had 126 in cash! :( llllaaaammmmeee! thats why you dont go snowboarding! haha man ive been really lagging it on my bloggin i totally forgot i could do it on my phone. only thing that sucks is if i write a long blog i type so quick now it registers like 3 seconds late! haha but its still awesome how i am writing this blog as i walk to my car, well im off to get my TB test! ill ttyl!

2009-03-04T23:27:00.001-08:00

Man yesterday was awesome! went snowboarding on a tuesday night! 30 bucks! night boarding! im super sore because i was on heelside the whole time because the snow was so hard and icy i couldnt practice my toeside! maybe next time! and im going again to big bear with elok next thursday! anyone wanna go?

Pretty freaken pissed off

2009-02-11T10:43:00.000-08:00

So this morning was when the waitlist opened for spring, so i got up at 5:30 got my laptop, my sisters laptop and eunice's computer put them all on the login menu and waited for it to hit 6am cuz thats when the site reopens. then i had my house phone and eunice's house and cell phone ready to call to register ont he phone. 6 a.m. hit, NEVER GOT THROUGH ONLINE CUZ THE SERVER WAS SO OVERRUN WITH PEOPLE! it wasnt til 6:45 that eunice finally got through the phone and registered me and now i am 10/10 on the waitlist for micro. so basically im screwed but im believe God wil make a way! i really need this class, its my last pre-req! and i cant not get in cuz it sets me back a another semester from applying and most of all the board at mt. sac said this was my last chance and if i dont do it then i dont get in since it was a approved petition to take micro over it only qualifies for this semester :( And i just tried registering for EVERY SINGLE MICRO CLASS they are all FULL :( pray for me guys please im so angry right now! THANKS EUNICE FOR HELPING ME

Philosophy Essay :)

2009-02-05T05:14:00.000-08:00

Edward Lara
Phil 5 TWTh 7:30am
2/5/09
The Cosmological/Teleological Argument

After studying both arguments for the existence of God, I found that both are the same, they serve the same purpose, one is just more broad then the other. For the cosmological argument, in itself is an argument type more than a particular argument. It uses the pattern of logos that creates a conclusion from assumed facts about the world to the existence of God. Simply stated it says that the universe exists, therefore God exists. There are a variety of different ways of arguing from this premise to this conclusion. For the teleological argument it argues the same basis with a more personal view, it gives us a better perspective of a designer that gives us a purpose, basically it’s the idea that it takes a “purpose” to have a purpose. Thus, if things are intended for a purpose, there must have been something that caused it for a reason, God.
The atheistic belief today is that the universe came to existence all by chance, and that at one point, came to existence out of nothing. How is this comprehendible, how does something come out of nothing? How does this complex universe come to pass from a black space of nothingness? In the cosmological the argument is this. First, a contingent being exists, us. We have a cause of or explanation for our existence. Our cause of or explanation for our existence is something other than ourselves. What exactly explains our existence? It must either be other contingent beings or include necessary being, God. But other contingent beings alone can’t provide a sufficient explanation for the existence of others. So there must a necessary being involved, God. Therefore a necessary being must exist, God must exist. Now through this deductive reasoning doesn’t this seem more logical than ”The universe came from nothing and came to pass all by chance”?
The teleological has the same reasoning but through examples in our world. If things show marks of design there must be a designer. Things such as Mt. Rushmore and the Grand Canyon are very different, in such because one was created with a design and by an intelligent being, the other was through random/natural acts of nature. Scientifically it is nowhere to be found that design is spontaneous, random and by chance, it always implies a designer. So obviously the greater the design then greater must be the designer. Based on this conclusion the universe itself would require a designer way beyond itself, something supernatural. Because the universe shows marks of design then the universe must have been created. When looked at thoroughly every life for on earth is highly complex. And there are hundreds of conditions that are required for life on earth. From mass and density to lightening activity all must be perfect for life to be sustained here. So the random chance of all these things occurring seems unlikely does it not? The odds of this occurring randomly are very high and not probable. With so much design is it logical to believe that we just got “lucky”?
Even with evolution being introduced into play, the intelligent design theory shows problems in the theory of evolution because it shows that chance simply cannot play a role explain life on earth. And even single celled bacteria have such a complexity that if even one part were missing there would be no potential for survival. This shows that the parts could not have occurred by chance.
The problem people seem to have with the existence of God isn’t in the two arguments themselves but in the attributes given to God and the current status of the society. The problem is with Evil the premise goes as followed: 1. If God exists, then evil would not exist 2. Evil exists 3. Therefore God does not exist. The question is, how can an all loving and all powerful God let there be so much evil in the world. But I believe this can be easily explained. Alvin planting had two implied premises when it came to this problem. He said that if God is omnipotent (all powerful) then he can create any world he desires. And because he is omnibenevolent, he would much prefer a world without evil over a world with evil. But this is when the “free will” comes to play. Because God has given us free will it is logically impossible to have a world of only good because of the simple fact that we can choose bad or evil. It is like trying to think of a four sided triangle it is impossible. Also because the whole world does not believe in God we cannot have a good society, because the belief in God and his teaching would greatly improve society. With this in mind the thought of St. Augustine comes to mind. He stated that “Evil is the absence of Good”. It is logical to believe this, there is such thing as heat, lots of heat, mega-heat, a little heat and even infinite heat, but there is no such thing as “cold”, we can go as far as 458 degrees below zero which is the total absence of heat. But there is no such thing as “cold” because we would be able to go colder than that. Cold is just a word we describe as the absence of heat. Another example is the thought of darkness, there is no such thing as darkness. It is the absence of light. You can have normal light, low light, or bright light but when you have no light you have darkness, which is what we use to define the word. If it weren’t true then you could always make darkness darker, but you can’t. So now, does evil exist? No, not in itself, evil is could simply be stated as the absence of God, just like cold or darkness, it’s a word we have created to describe the absence of God.
Looking at all the evidence, all the theories and all the arguments, everything logically points to a creator or designer. It is much too unlikely for everything to have occurred by chance. There had to be a necessary being to create a contingent being. So there must be a God.

I hope i get a good grade! i just finished it right now! 5am! lol

To Those who are looking for the "ONE"

2009-01-30T13:01:00.000-08:00

Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone To have a deep soul relationship with another. To be loved thoroughly, and exclusively But God to the Christian says, No… Not until you are satisfied, fulfilled and contented with being loved by Me alone, with giving yourself totally unreserved to Me. Discovering that only Me is your satisfaction to be found Then you will be capable of the perfect human relationship That I have planned for you. You will never be united with another until you are united with Me. Exclusive of anyone or anything else. Exclusive of any desires and longing. I want you to stop planning, stop wishing, And allow Me to give you the most thrilling plan existing One that you cannot imagine. I want you to have the best, please allow Me to give it to you. Just keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things Keep experiencing the satisfaction that I am Keep listening and learning the things I tell you You just wait…that’s all! Don’t be anxious, don’t worry. Don’t look around at the things other have gotten or I have given them. Don’t look at the things you think you have. You just keep looking off and away up to Me… Or you’ll miss what I want to show you… And then, when you are ready, I’ll surprise you with a love Far more wonderful than any of you dream of. You see, until you are ready and until the one I have for you is ready. (I’m working to have you both ready at the same time), Until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me and the life I prepare for you. You won’t be able to experience the love that exemplifies Your relationship with Me and is thus the perfect time. I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me. And to enjoy materially and concretely the everlasting union of beauty. Perfection and love that I offer you myself Know that I love you utterly, Believe and be satisfied.

Amen to that

I find it funny how

2009-01-23T14:44:00.001-08:00

One day i can be so angry and irritated at the world, and the next its like you know what stuff happens, people make mistakes, or people really do care (it just seems like they don't) for everyone who called yesterday sorry i took a day to just hang out and step off the grid, first because i used it to think and second because i didnt have minutes (mainly why i didn't answer anyone's call) but I've had a lot of time to think and ponder and you know what things happen, drama happens, but most of the time its cuz people care, even if i hate it and its something against me i just gotta grit my teeth and take it in i guess sucks, i want to lash out, i guess that's what my last blog was about, it really wasn't directed to anyone i was just so frustrated with so many people asking questions and its like not even a question, more of a statement that really gets tiring so sorry, i guess a lot of whats on a blog shouldn't be taking completely seriously because a blog is used to vent correct? so I am pretty much back to normal, im fine, im cool, but i still am not answering calls before 9 haha unless you are verizon! so i guess i will talk to you guys later!

Let what passed be past

2009-01-23T14:30:00.000-08:00

And look forward to the future. Deal? DEAL! :D

some things will

2009-01-22T08:39:00.000-08:00

Never change, but that's life. It's cool im over it, people don't want to believe what I say and chismis chismis chismis then its all good, its just talk. So go ahead talk all you want, I know the truth, you dont. What i love is i have found my true friends through these experiences and if you are questioning if you are one of them then you probably aren't =). But like i said that's life, there's no point getting bent out of shape about it we are still friends I'm not gonna be fake with our friendship or anything i have just got my eyes opened and seen peoples true characters. I am so glad i did my devotion last night because I know that even if it seems things are hectic God is always in control and always has a plan "His tracking in my life will never Fail". I don't have anyone to depend on (FRIENDS, family, co-workers) But God and that's all i need. :) peace.

BTW "GOOD MORNING!"

another incredible night!

2009-01-19T22:18:00.000-08:00

I LOVE MY COUSINS! :)

this weekend

2009-01-18T18:11:00.000-08:00

WAS INCREDIBLE! you guys have no Idea, well only 1 person has an idea kinda sucks how amazing it was cuz now that im stuck here at home doing nothing its so BLAH!!! I WANNA DO SOMETHING!!!

2009-01-15T22:01:00.001-08:00

I have been so happy these past few weeks you guys dont even know! i have spent it with people i love and care about so much! especially my best friend! love you guys! if u wanna know about my week read genelles blog lol

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2009-01-02T12:49:00.001-08:00

So im here at work pretty bored, and i just realized the value of family, and the saying " friends come and go, but family is there forever" I've taken my family for granted way too much this last year, and this year its gonna be different, ive always put my friends first but thats gonna change. It just sucks that i realized this the day after my family leaves for the Philippines. meh its ok ill make it eem like they are still here lol well ya as for new years iit was kool. kinda boring cuz there was no get together at our house like usual, just immediate family. And there were no fireworks AT ALL! not even street legal (cuz we always have the best illegal ones) but it was nice cuz after the countdown we got in a circle and prayed for the coming year, it was awesome!

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2008-12-31T19:16:00.001-08:00

so as many of you may have heard my dad's mother, my lola laling passed away saturday morning, the family is totally ok, we have speculated her going to the Lord for a couple of years now so ya we are at peace with it. as for my family tunrs out all of them are going to the PI for her funeral, except me of course cuz i have work and i start school next week, so if you are reading this, i am having a little kick back at my house this saturday, the 3rd! and not many people read this so if u invited! but its BYOB if you dont know what that means then dont go! lol k ill blog more later peace!

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2008-12-26T09:36:00.001-08:00

So my manager said to be here at 9 o clock and im sitting in my car and it is now 9:15 and turns out its our assistant manager opening with me and she doesnt drive, shes preety lazy and doesnt do much, so i would expect her to be here at 9:30 like we usually do, pretty gay cuz thats an extra 30 min of money that i miss out on! plus all the waiting in the car!! man this is so much more convenient doing this on my phone, since im always on it then on my computer plus now i can put down thoughts on the spot rather than at the end of the day when i forgot 80% of what did lol so anyways christmas was awesome! went to the 11 o clock service and spent the first few minutes of christmas holding a candle with the congregation praiseing and thanking God twas nice! then we opened presents and i got my missions money that i wanted! :) then greeted everyone else via text a merry christmas! and hit
the sac around 3. wow the bad part about this is there is a 2-3 second delay after i have typed!

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holy crap! genelle i figured

2008-12-26T01:28:00.001-08:00

holy crap! genelle i figured out how to blog from my phone! this is so tight!! and it doesnt show that whole verizon thing!

hhmm does this really work

2008-12-26T01:26:00.001-08:00

hhmm does this really work on my phone?

things are different

2008-12-16T18:30:00.001-08:00

and im ok with it, i guess u just gotta roll with the punches right? at least i made new friends!

I honestly....

2008-12-09T20:18:00.000-08:00

Don't want to talk to anyone for a while. And thanks for the talk kimi and jim!

I cant believe....

2008-12-05T10:37:00.001-08:00

I lost my wallet, i have no ideo where it is....

This weekend was...

2008-11-30T20:31:00.000-08:00

SIMPLY AMAZING! i am a part of core!!! YAY! LOL SCARED AND EXCITED! I HAVE SO MUCH TO DO RIGHT NOW SO ILL KEEP IT SHORT! SO I GUESS SOMEONE CHANGED THE BACKGROUND OF MY BLOGGER? WEIRD...

Happy Thanksgiving!!

2008-11-27T09:21:00.000-08:00

thats all i have to say! OH AND I THANKS GOD FOR ALL YOU WHO READ THIS! YES YOU ERIKA, GENELLE, EUNICE AND ARLAINE!

i am seriously

2008-11-10T12:00:00.001-08:00

starting to get tired of blogging, i mean i have a lot to sa, im just too lazy to type it! :/ there is no more motivation!

so guess where i am?

2008-11-06T11:09:00.000-08:00

Well ill tell you where im not! im not in my bio lecture! HAHA im here in the cafe doing stuff for church trying to do my bio lab and chem lab blah blah blah KEY WORDS IS TRYING :D

So the elections are over and you know what congrats to Barack Obama on being the 44th President. The elections are over so there no point hating or talking smack cuz at the end of the day Obama is our President. And as i have learned through the passed week. If we PRAYED as much as we COMPLAINED about this country and its leadership and govenment. This country, government and its leaders would be a lot better off. So all i can say is everyone please pray for obama, it says in the bible to pray for our leaders, even if we dont agree with some of their beliefs, we are still under them so we must pray that God will guide him into making the right decisions.

At least we won 1 battle, Prop 8. These passed few months have really challenged my belief system especially because this. ive seen so many arguements for and against and studied it pretty well and have realized flaws on both sides but mostly of the No on prop 8 side. I have tremendous respect for all those who have down their research. As long as you know about the subject and done your own thinking then kudos to you. Its those ignorant ones that just follow the media and who ever else they listen to and believe everything they say. Im not only talking about the No on prop 8 but also the yes. Ive learned through my cousin carol that we as christians really need to look into these types of matters and not follow what the religious institution says we must follow. My pastors are always telling me "dont take my word for it look it up in the scripture to see its biblical and im not just blowing smoke".

I assure you i have looked through both sides and its still obvious that prop 8 is the right choice. If you you look at the CALIFORNIA FAMILY CODE SECTION 297.5 it clearly states

"297.5. (a) Registered domestic partners shall have the same rights,
protections, and benefits, and shall be subject to the same
responsibilities, obligations, and duties under law, whether they
derive from statutes, administrative regulations, court rules,
government policies, common law, or any other provisions or sources
of law, as are granted to and imposed upon spouses."

So please someone tell me what is it about, If they have the same "rights" as a married couple already what is it about? is it all for the name? i really dont understand whats the purpose. Because if it were to pass and people tried to get married in churches where they were refused, it becomes a descrimination law suit and obviously the church loses. How is a church supposed to do something that clearly states in the bible we can not do because it is sin. Are they not imposing their beliefs and values unto us? And dont anyone tell me that would have never happened cuz it already did in a few states in the east coast. Churches have lost their tax benefits because they were sued because of descrimination for not marrying a gay couple.

Man i get so heated with this arguement. i have so many thoughts running through my head. i gotta calm down.

Ok so i dont mean to sound like a super anti gay activists, because truth be told i was really against prop 8, i realized because of the whole seperation between church and state, under that law we really have no say as a church because it becomes a civil rights issure no an ethical issue. But when i found section 297.5 it all changed because they all have the same rights already so i realy dont understand what all the fuss is about. If someone can explain please do!

Ok im done blogging its tiring, to think so much peace!

I JUST VOTED!

2008-11-04T14:55:00.000-08:00

LIKE 15 MINUTES AGO! YAY! GO MCCAIN, PROP 4 AND 8!

SO TODAY I

2008-11-03T07:50:00.000-08:00

Went on myspace >.< But i promise i only went on there to post up the proposition 8 video!! and i will go on again tonight and maybe 2morrow but i promised that it!!! Let us pray for our state people!

K i guess its time to do chemistry homework...... yay....

Almost forgot!

2008-10-29T11:42:00.001-07:00

day 3 all i gotta say is HAHA!

SSSoooo

2008-10-29T11:06:00.000-07:00

Im starting to get realy lazy with blogging when im at home so i decided to ditch my chem friends sit in front of my lecture classes and blog for the next 20 minutes haha

So i got my quiz back from chem that i took last week and i got a B! haha better then i expected to get! hopefully i can pull of an A in this class but i guess i can settle for a B. I am finall starting to do things i said i would do and getting things done! The thing is im not going to classes so i can do it >.<

But its kool! hmm in chem classes today i almost died because my friend broke the thermometer and it smelled horrible! we all thought it was mercury in it and as you chem people know its toxic like a MOTHA! but it was just alcohol :)

hopefully this week gets fun! i got to work 5 1/2 hours monday thursday i should work like 7 and friday i am working 9 hours!!! BANK BANK BANK! and i hope erika cant make it on saturday so genelle can go with me to jesse's play! :D just kidding! if she does go with erika i will probably go to the movies by myself and chhhhiillll lol anyone wanna join?!

Ive been feelin eehhh right now with my walk, i guess i just gotta force myself to get into it, read my books, my bible, and do my devotions! Even if i dont want to >.< I gotta make that sacrificial praise right?!?! ok i guess chem is going to start soon so ill ttyl! peace

day 2

2008-10-28T11:47:00.000-07:00

even easier! lol

Day 1

2008-10-27T10:15:00.001-07:00

without myspace. Not so bad! lol this is gonna be a piece of cake!

This past week.....

2008-10-26T21:08:00.000-07:00

So what can i say abotu this past week? well not very much i guess :/ i dont know, just information that has come to my attention made, what was supposed to be one of my funnest weeks ever, to not really feelin it. Ive been kinda down and emo this past week just because i found things out and its like meh affecting my mood, pretty wack. and i learned at church wednesday that WHAT? "DONT LET OTHER PEOPLES ACTIONS AFFECT YOUR ATTITUDE" ive learned that this is WAY easier said then done, i know that ya i joke around with people abotu it, but when it comes down to the serious business i try not to, but it still does and i apologize for ruining the mod or the moment, people just dont understand, and if you dont know, then that either means we dont talk all that much or its about you. so its just gonna take some time i guess to get out of this slump.

This week was supposed to be awesome! since it was scion night and we went to knotts on thursday but i found myself wednesday driving and just wanted to leave covina and go drive somewhere far far away, i guess just the stresses of life finally getting to me, since ive taken this semester WAY too lightly. But this week wasnt a total bust i was able to play with pastor mels band and it was an awesome experience and i got to "study" with genelle at denny's but we just ended up talking the whole time and that was a really fun experience. Then i went to Eunice's hosue and we played rockband, and watched "Another Cinderella Story" CORNY! oh and she made me break the drums for rockband lol by kicking me and making me fall on it! >.<

So another thing i noticed is that today during church at oasisi found myself having a hard time worshiping God. and i realized, that these past few months since ive taken up more responsibilities at church, its been all work. How to make youth better, How to get people involved, how to get people to open, up, making lineups, calling people to play for friday and what not. i dont have as much time to just sit down and bask in God's presence and really feel him you know? i just ask you guys to keep me in your prayers and just hopefully it was a one time thing feelin like that, cuz i honestly felt empty and jealous that everyone around me was passionately worshiping God but i couldnt even when i tried :/

Lastly i wanna say sorry again for the people i made angry this past week, its really hard for me to talk to you people right now jsut cuz everything is hitting me at once and i really dont know what to do anymore, so please bare with me because im afraid if i talk to any of you people, im gonna end up blowing up in your face and just TOTALLY ruining our friendship, if it hasnt already been ruined :/ k peace

AJ Rafael "Something Happens"

2008-10-20T09:11:00.001-07:00

I dedicate this song to genelle and myself lol listen to it, good song! :/ again, you people dont know what im talking about! actually as the days go by more and more of you find out so i guess not :/

What genelle said

2008-10-20T07:25:00.000-07:00

nuff said. lol ok well maybe a little more said haha. IF you dont know the story then you dont need to know!! haha you gotta know what what my life is in order to know what too look for in genelles blogger! haha sucka! mann stupid library wont open yet! jeez i gotta do chem hw! lol

Yay im learnign about Meiosis!

2008-10-14T10:02:00.000-07:00

man bio sucks haha, but ya yesterday was an interesting day, full of so many different emotions! i got my test back from human sexuality that i didnt study AT ALL i mean literally looked at nothing thought i would fail, but i got a 72 and turns out no one got an A so she is curving it lol which probably means i got a B haha freaken awesome! then somethign funny happened before that but meh dont wanna say lol inside joke! RIGHT GENELLE? i noticed that everything i talk about basically genelle is the only one tha knows what im talking about ahha
But anyway hope all of you guys are doing good im too lazy to really blog cuz i wanna watch my one tree hill episode since i missed it because of heroes! haha k ill blog later PEACE!

You know what i HATE!

2008-10-13T09:49:00.000-07:00

Big guhe guys, or just guys who think they are all kool wearing little girl backpacks, some huge samaon football player just passed me wearing a little mermaid backpack. I swear why do they do that? is it because they know no one will mess with them for it? its like wow you are super KOOL because you are wearing al ittle girls backpack, these are times when i wished i went to a university instead of mt sac. I tell this to my friends who do go to them "you guys are so lucky because you know when you walk through your campus no one here is an idiot or a moron" because you had to have some brains to get into a UC and most, if not all of those people probably wont be walking around UCI or Berkeley wearing a freaken little mermaid backpack. I gotta get out of here to experience the college life :/

i FIND IT FUNNY HOW

2008-10-13T08:00:00.000-07:00

We use blogs to show express our inner most feelings, or well to be able to vent out and tell the world how we really feel without really offending anyone directly in the process. But ive come across so many blogs including mine, find it it hard to express their true feelings on this such as Love or who they like for fear that the person is going to read it even though you dont state the name everyone can pretty much guess who you are talking about UNLESS you are really good , like me :) lol

But really whats the purpose of using a blog when you can express your true feelings about things.maybe its just a way to tell people about your day? or a way to be able to cuss out the person that pissed you off today without telling them in their face?

Theres only 1 person i know who isnt afraid to say how she really feels about EVERYTHING thats YOU genelle! lol you have some guts woman, you are lucky he doesnt go online, let alone go on your blogger! lol maybe thats why you are able to say that much? haha i was gonna tell him to on your's too lol! k i guess its time to study peace yall!

Yesterday!

2008-10-10T14:38:00.000-07:00

Was freaken incredible! WELL MAYBE NOT THE DAY but last night was so tight!! im clubbin at irvine every time now! screw hollywood!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

2008-10-07T23:58:00.000-07:00

eunice, priscilla, zeph, justin!

yay bio class

2008-10-07T10:11:00.000-07:00

learning about g1 phase S phase G2 phase and M phase...... blah blah blah cell cycle, blah! haha its boring, but at least i finally know how to do the rubiks cube! :) man this is hard :( but you gotta do what you gotta do right? if you dont know what im talking about then you're not important enough to know about~! JUST KIDDING :)

my weekend

2008-10-07T08:38:00.001-07:00

was fun. dont feel like blogging about it. hAPPY BIRTHDAY ate melorie! AND TO THE 8 PEOPLE WHOS BIRTHDAYS ARE 2MORROW! ill probably blog in an hour when im in bio class :D

QUOTE OF THE YEAR

2008-10-02T21:31:00.000-07:00

"If you love someone, let them go. If they return to you, it was meant to be. If they don't, their love was never yours to begin with..."

:) I hope! LOL some of you think you know what im talking about but you really have no idea!

Outraged!

2008-09-30T20:33:00.000-07:00

So i didnt go to bio lecture today, lol thats why ther eis no post at 10 in the morning haha i didnt wake up early enough! or at least didnt wanna have to find parking so i stayed home till lab at 12 and went into it, i swear these people are retarded, this girl is complaing how she gets horrible quiz grades in the lab, shes getitng like 5 out of 10, i dont even study and i at least get 8, while shes outside readin gthe whole lab! its nuts! ok so thats not why im outraged, after class i went home had a good heart to heart with genelle, thanks again for bringing me back to reality! :) i went to work and found out that they we are sellign the pizza's for 6 DOLLARS NOW! if its not a pepperoni or cheese! can u believe that! thats so retarded, if you know how it works it really screws up the system because a hawaiian pizza is still 6.50, 7.04 with tax which means 5 for the pineapple and 1.50 for the ham (or any extra topping) so that makes no sense how it can still be the same, because they are paying 6.50 with tax for a different topping and paying only 50 cents more when you buy a hawaiin. its just really retarded to me because ive seen it when everything was still the same:
large pizza's (any 1 topping)$5,
deepdish $6,
crazy bread $1
italian cheesebread 2.50
This was all in the beginning of the year now the prices are:
Large pizza (different topping) $6
Deep Dish $7
crazy bread 1.50
italian cheesebread $3.50

its nuts how they have just suddenly raised all the prices! im jsut mad for the customers sake even though i get everything the original price also with a discount cuz im G like that! lol but this is also info for all you readers! little caesars is getting wack!

Word of the day "WOW" haha inside joke?

2008-09-29T22:23:00.000-07:00

been a while sicne ive done a blog! interesting, well not much has gone one here, im just enjoying my life one day at a time, well actually theres has been a lot that has happened haha but its so much that i dont really feel like talking about it ill just start with yesterday. hmmm went to church had core meeting then kicked it with kimi halcon eunice my sis and mike, went to glendale and chilled at the frogs for a good hour brainstorming about possible ideas for talent night. Then we went to the holloween store and played with masks, eunice' mask was pretty scary, well it was actually her face! HAHa! THANKS FOR READING MY BLOG FOR THE FIRST TIME LIKE 20 MINUTES AGO EUNICE! well then we went to drop eunice off at rizzas hosue and ended up staying and eating and watching rizza's debut haha. then i dropped everyone else off and went home procrastinated on my project which was due today! and didnt study at all for my chem exam, which was today!

So this morning i woke up at 4 to wake eunice up then went back to sleep only to be waken up by her at 6! :( then i went to school at 7 stayed in the library to finish up my project (had to make a freaken movie all by myself since my group didnt show up....) then i studied like 15 minutes for my chem exam. Then at 1130 i took the exam and found out i got the right answers!! haha well for the most part so im not that scared to look at my score!. then i went to my human sexuality class that i woke early for and rushed to finish the project only to have the teacher say we didnt have enough time to get to us so we would do it wednesday, today was like a reoccurance of last semester stressing out till the very last minute when it was just now or never. man i really cant handle those days anymore, they are just too BLAH! haha k im done

dont you like my blogs they are straight to the point, no BS no thoughts really they just tell you about my day. theres no whinning and complaing of how much it sucks and going on with why im unhappy or happy, not to disrespect all you fellow bloggers out there thats kool, its just not my style, unless of cours its something tragic? or maybe im just a hypocrit and nothing remotely bad is happening to me at this point of my life. WE SHALL SEE!

So yesterday was AWESOME!

2008-09-22T09:32:00.000-07:00

first of all I GOT TO GO TO CHURCH! :) we should all be happy that we live in a country that give us religious freedom, and it is a Huge privileged to be able to go to CHURCH! :) thats my new mindset and that's what yours should be also. I'm trying to teach myself to say "Oh sorry i cant go i GET to go to church today" not "I HAVE to go to church today" YOU TRY IT :)

Ok so second best thing that happened to me i was able to go to my FIRST dodger game!! IT WAS FREAKEN GREAT! WWAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY BETTER than on TV. Doing the wave, screaming at the umpire hitting beach balls all around lol eating 5 dollar hotdogs and 6 dollar cups of soda MmMmM LOL twas very fun! then we went to JJ's cafe and chilled and aite and got murdered by eunice in our sugar game :/ thank goodness she has a heart and didnt make me eat the 4 packs of sugar THANKS EUNICE! even thogh u dont read this lol. then i took erika and eunice to burbank and we rocked out in my car the whole time there! it was FUN! LOL then i went home to procrastinate on my hw which i just finished right now in the library!

last thing FREAKEN HEROES TONIGHT AT 9? I THINK OR MAYBE 8 IF ITS A 2 HOUR PREMIER!

Instigator!

2008-09-18T23:15:00.000-07:00

oh gee give everyone a break & just act like you actually care; a real daughter would comfort her dad in these times... & why can't you just get a life! you're such a PATHETIC DRAMA QUEEEN!!!!!!

ouch that was harsh! who ever said that! lol

You know what

2008-09-18T10:19:00.000-07:00

for those of you who read this, genelle and arlaine, have i not been doing good lately?! lol ive really kept up on this blogging thing! bad thing is its every time im bored or in my bio class, which means im not listening. But its ok since i pretyy much know most of it lol i mean ATP? come on they are made by the mitochondria "the powerhouse of the cell" and are used for energy! lol and i wasnt even listening its just from what i know lol. but ya at least there is never a blog while im in my chem class, cuz then that would be horrible! cuz that class i really need to listen i have to memorize the first 54 elements on the periodical table, how to spell and their abreviations :/ it not that hard but ehhh lol at least we dont have to memorize their atomic number or mass! lol well ya 1 more day and its youthnight! yay!
So yesterday i ditched human sexuality so i can go to the gym workout and soom to mikes house to meet my sister so she could drive to LA. We then went to Cal state LA so she could pay for her classes, no hot girls btw :(, she then bought me a lifesavers popsicle, best popsicle i have ever tasted in my LIFE! and then we tried to get condoms for my human sexuality class for a project lol but the health center was closed, then we went to church to meet up with mike and we all carpools to american where we met up with genelle! :D we were able to ride the trolly twice and final see the water show! it kool lol and we got pretty wet, then we met up with jim and halcon at COH went to mike restaraunt helped them close or eat the rest of their chinese food and ended up going to Master Chef in china town.
Then from there we had a pretty hilarious night with Wich, Beto, Jason, and jamie pretty hilarious folks! man why couldnt we do days like this in the summer? :/ all good though, its happening now! oh and thanks genelle for coming out early to chill with us even though u didnt have to or want to :D i wasnt a third wheel anymore! lol

old habits die hard

2008-09-16T21:22:00.000-07:00

i find myself looking at her myspace and facebook again and its starting to get to me again :/ i see her talking to boys and its like eehhh. man i really need to get over this!! i hope she finds someone new soon so we can both get over eachother completely :/

im here right in front of bio, waiting for my teacher

2008-09-16T09:43:00.000-07:00

we have a quiz i havent studied, i didnt do the lab in my next class and we also have a quiz which i obviously could not have studied.... and im still gonna ace everything! MMWWAAAHAHAH im excited for friday!!! we get to fellowship with another youth! about freaken time! and i want to give a shout out to the retard that changed my name lol talk about immature! HAHA you know who you are ahemahemgenelleahemahem lol jk..... 10 minutes later 7 more minutes and we could have left! freaken wack! stupid bio teacher! Man someone near me smells really musty, GROSS, and no its not me genelle! i checked already haha alright time for my quiz

girls

2008-09-15T23:33:00.000-07:00

can get pretty retarded sometimes, thats why i guess im single :)

I almost forgot LET US PRAY

2008-09-11T10:39:00.000-07:00

for the families that lost love ones 7 years ago this day. thank God for his grace that another attack has not happened the last 7 years! hope you all have a great day! WOW 3 POSTS IN 1 DAY IM FREAKEN BORED!

CAN ANYONE HELP ME?!

2008-09-11T10:31:00.000-07:00

i want to fix up this blogger! i dont know how to though?! how do u subscribe to people so it shows on the left? and so i dont have to look around on peoples bloggers or livejournals to look for others! k thanks!

Bio lab

2008-09-11T10:02:00.000-07:00

so im here chillin in my bio 1 lecture, bored as heck! i really dont want to go to this lecture AT ALL anymore because all he does is literally read off the power point and occasionally add some nonsense facts that are sometime irrelivent to what we are supposed to be learning. Now dont get me wrong he is an easy chill teacher, i feel like im in a lecture for a university because he doesnt teach us like children and he teaches us like we are supposed to know these things. Its funny because if I hadnt taken anatomy, microbiology, physiology, and nutrition already i wouldnt have a clue of what hes talking about, i learned all this already and i can just imagine what everone else is thinking because this class is really the first science class someone is supposed to take. Yay hes talking aboutu lipids and the nutritional value and its breakdown of what they are made of! lol
Alright so anways been a while since i posted something on this. since the first day of school! 16 days ago! well school is easy, life is chill, just enjoying this semester cruising it all the way BABY! made a lot of new friends, a few hott ones =) haha and a shout out to GENELLE cuz she is one of the only people who reads this, but i dont think you read this anymore because i havent written in it in a while! haha you better have taken lots of pics with your hott friends last night!! haha man this class is boring!!! i hate it so much! "did you know that cholesterol is a lipid that serves an important function in cells? HOWEVER elevated levels of cholesterol and fats in the blood can be detrimental to health" THIS IS HOW BORED I AM! yay NOW PROTEINS!
OK OK OK im done, so i cant wait for 2morrow i get my new voyager! and to the brooke fraser concert! YES!! LOL but i can wait for today because right after this class i gotta zoom home get changed and go back to work =( ive been off for 3 weeks and it felt awesome! but you gotta earn that chedder i guess :/ alright i guess thats it for now back to surfing the web not listening to my teacher lecture! haha PEACE! ONE LOVE!

my post under this

2008-08-25T21:22:00.000-07:00

is my schedule for the semester so ya you know where im at! so my first day was alright, chill, kinda wack cuz there were no GIRLS! MT SAC FAILS FOR MONDAY! but 2morrow is a new first day! lol so hpefully i got some for my bio class! k night!

first day of school .....

2008-08-25T21:20:00.000-07:00

Total Registered Credit Units: 12.0

Class Type	Ref. No.	Course ID	Units	Days	Hours	Bldg/Room	Dates	Instructor	Status	Drop Code
CR	117803	BIOL1	4	TTh	9:45AM-11:10AM	14-1	08/25 -12/14	MC CABE, D	Enrolled
CR	117803		4	T	12:00PM-3:10PM	7-1111	08/25 -12/14		Enrolled
CR	118169	BIOL15	3	MW	2:15PM-3:40PM	7-1209	08/25 -12/14	HOGGAN, L	Enrolled
CR	117391	CHEM10	4	MW	11:30AM-12:55PM	7-1114	08/25 -12/14	GOLESTANEH, K	Enrolled
CR	117391		4	M	1:05PM-2:10PM	7-1114	08/25 -12/14	GOLESTANEH, K	Enrolled
CR	117391		4	W	8:00AM-11:10AM	60-3601	08/25 -12/14	GOLESTANEH, K	Enrolled
CR	117253	PE-F10	1	Arrange	3.00 hours	50G-WT1	08/25 -12/14	BUFF, H

my week..

2008-08-20T18:24:00.000-07:00

HAS BEEN INCREDIBLE! monday went to six flags and chilled with the church peeps! even though it closed at 8 still had an amazing day with them, especially on gold rusher with our sock fest! i slept over erikas house adn chilled with her and rizza on tuesday, went to topenga mall bought a vest from H&M and took pics at the mac store. Then baked a cake, made banana tempura, glazed apples, spam masubi, and corn beef! lol then me and erika washed my car and her van and had some one on one time with her. it was a very awesome day! EVEN THOUGH SHE WAS BEING MAARTE IN THE MORNING! lol and today was boring! haha well as u can see i get straight to the point not bothering to double check grammar or spelling errors, this aint no english class so i dont care! SUCKA! PEACE!

So i know no one reads this

2008-08-12T22:20:00.001-07:00

so i can pretty much say what ever i want, talk crap about people, cuss, be perverted, too bad i dont do that online lol so im here at morongo and its awesome! just chilling here not gambling, swimming and getting tips from my parents because of being good luck! i feel i havent done anything big this summer, but then again i went to worship conference, Fil am at santa maria, and went to vegas for a week for my birthday. but i guess that was all dont the last week of june and the first 2 weeks of july, havent done anything else but go to six flags! :( i need to hang out with people!

LIFE IS..

2008-08-11T11:43:00.000-07:00

is good! but summer is boring, happy ARLAINE? lol

VEGAS

2008-07-08T12:56:00.000-07:00

so far ive been here for 3 days and its been pretty good, haven't done anything but i've gotten to know mikes friends and brother, and thats what i really wanted to do. but ya i was able to go to the best BUFFET in vegas at the rio, 26 bucks a person, and it really is the BEST AND BIGGEST buffet i have ever been too! if you are reading this you need to go to this buffet its called the CARNIVAL WORLD BUFFET! freaken BOMB! but ya started today imma walk the strip and actually party at night instead of watch tv and text eunice or erika at night lol. so ya i had a party last saturday and it was my first kickback/party and the best night and worse nextmorning/day of my life. first time getting drunk and i never want to do it again, im never drinking SKY vodka EVER! but it was still a good experience, i want to thank kimi and jc for having my back and making me throw up because it was for the best, also thanks JC for trying to stick your finger down my throat and cleaning up my vomit after i knocked over the bucket, also thanks tim for changing me in my parents room lol after jim and kimi pushed me into the pool! and thanks to everyone else for being there! it was seriously awesome!!! :) alright im done now!

I think

2008-06-30T09:36:00.001-07:00

im gonna stop trying....

ITS....

2008-06-25T20:52:00.000-07:00

not getting any easier, all i do is watch youtube videos all day :/

First post Ever

2008-06-24T11:56:00.000-07:00

So i never thought i would use this crap, EVER i signed up for this for an online philosophy class which i dropped in the winter. I haven't touched this thing since. But now i cant seem to do anything because all i can think about is her. So i guess ill just express everything through this crap. So we just broke up yesterday and i know it was for the best, it was one of the hardest things ive ever had to do in my life, i thought i was ready, this passed weekend i was sure of it, i was gonna visit her at UCI sit her down, talk about our relationship see how she though of it, tell her what i thought and BAM! But when it came to it it was fully of tears sobbing and incomplete sentences, almost all of it from me. How do you tell someone that you were sure you were gonna marry that you can no longer be with them because of what God wants for you. It just seemed so i dont know, not good enough? I explained it pretty well to her and she understood and got where i was coming from, which made it so much harder, how can the girl that i love and that seems to be perfect for me, not be the one for ME? It sucks because she WAS/IS the perfect girl, but the fact that God is not number 1 in her life, makes her unperfect. I know this is what i needed to do, but now that I've done it, i cant stop thinking about her. This was the worst time to do it also our 2 years is this Friday and i have nothing to do for this summer but work, so im stuck at home doing nothing but looking at her myspace and facebook all day, seeing how much of it she changes, refreshing her site 10 times a minute. I need to do something, but what? I know this is the Time to focus on God but its so hard, i have so much to do yet, i say i have nothing to do? kinda stupid, im just being lazy i guess. all i want to do is just sit and sulk. Its kind of funny because not a lot of people know yet, i dont even think my group of friends know yet, EVERYONE though we were the perfect couple, but no one knew how i felt inside, how much God was nagging at my heart on how this relationship was wrong. I just hope if anyone reads this they understand why i did. If this even makes sense, im pretty much all over the place right now, this is my firs time doing this since XANGA which was like 6 years ago so im a little rusty with the order of things this is just to help out to vent with how i feel so i can stop being like THIS! aaahhhh THANKS GENELLE ARROYO for recommending this lol i hope o spelled your last name right! ok off to the salvation army! PEACE!